Sunday, April 8, 2007

No. 0008 - Grocery Traffic Controller

The average temperature to most produce section of the grocery store is usually lower. Some grocery store even have the entire room refrigerated for the produce, such as the one grocery store I visited today. The store (17th street market for my Arizonian friends) is truely one of the greatest grocery store that I've visited in a long time. It has quite a variety of vegetables and exotic fruits, some that I've only seen in places such as Chinatown. While I was still at awed of the selections of produce there, an unprecedent amount of asian people starting flooding into the refrigerated produce room. Before I even realize it, I found myself in an ocean of people. So here I am, caught somewhere between the bok choy and the bitter melon section, wearing a hawaiian short and t-shirt; I was starting to freeze. By that point I had no choice but to crash out before frost bite sets in. After side swipping and rear ending a few people and shopping carts, I was out. The warmth feels good but I could have freezed to death in there. That is why we need a traffic controler in the refrigerated produce room such as this one. Maybe they can establish a loop, or a round about where carts can only travel in one direction. All abandoned cart will be towed at the user's expense. Parallel parking time must be limited to keep the flow going. All violations of such traffic rules will be subjected to the punishment of the Grocery Traffic Law Enforcer (GTLE). His or her job is to keep an eye for any offenders of the grocery store's traffic laws. When such violations occur, the GTLE have every rights to take away produce from violators' cart at the check out and say, for example "NO SHITAKE MUSHROOMs FOR YOU!"


Abbie Sorg said...

Or instead, you could just go to the market when it isn't so busy :P

I love going to that market to gawk at all the weird foods people eat, and to buy fun and foreign candy.

Mark Egan said...

Dude, Patrick, you got me laughing again... I'm glad you made it out alive.